last day of 2002, and i'm at work dozing off, i've been pretty bad with the updates lately, i'm having the annual attack of the winter blues so most of the time i'm just staring at the ceiling with tori amos in my cd player. i thought i was doing pretty okay up until these past couple of weeks when everything came crashing down again, i've been neglecting my paper journal also, so my little blog don't feel bad it's not you mommy's just having one of her "episodes". i'm going have run down of the stuff that happened to me for the past two months that i was in hiatus from blogger and i must warn you reading this might cause severe boredom, so have a paper cup ready in case you find yourself drooling

november
november flew by pretty quickly, november is usually the month that kills my checking account. november also marked my return to "young adulthood" by way going out to drink and then puking my brains out, so far that was just a fluke because now i'm back to my old ways (eating ramen noodles and vegging in front of the tv). november also meant shorter working hours for us here in the office, i had a month of regis and kelly that would last me a lifetime. thanksgiving is also celebrated on this festive month, we had a week off from work so i hopped on the plane to visit my family in florida, ahhh the deep south, there is no better way to spend your vacation than eating at all you can eat restos and stuffing yourself with artery clogging food. the weather was pretty chilly (i was expecting miami like weather but i forgot they lived in pensacola which is closer alabama and lousiana so i brought the wrong outfits doh! need a lesson in geography) but i'm sure glad i missed the snow storm in dc. i had a pretty good time there, it was fun hanging out with my cousins i was really sad when i went home, up to now i still miss them and i hope to visit them again one of these days, or better yet hope we could all fly back to the philippines in may.

december
december meant nicole frantically buying christmas gifts. for three weekends straight i was at the mall fighting my way through racks and racks of clothing. it was crazy! so now i've learned my lesson, that is to buy stuff online and as much as possible start christmas shopping in october, people have this crazed look in their eyes it's scary, they look like they're in some kind of a christmas trance i'm now scarred for life. i made it just in time for our "christmas party", i'm glad my friends liked their gifts, after all i risked getting trampled by hordes of eager shoppers so they better appreciate it. christmas eve rolled in and i found myself alone in my apartment, and for the first time since god knows when i started to cry and bawl like a new born babe, maybe it was the snow or the idea that i was spending christmas alone that made the tears flow, i didn't even have food to eat except a week old ham! lol i find it funny now but at that time i was so sad that i started to hate christmas (blasphemy!) and also my friends, for leaving me behind, kind of pathetic but i truly felt that way, however in hindsight i'm glad i spent christmas eve alone, it made me appreciate my family even more and made me realize that there's nothing wrong with solitude, it's a nice change of pace from all the craziness and drama.

so that's about it, 2003 is just 9 hours away, this year has been good to me got a lot to be thankful for, i was able to go home for the first time since i came to the states, i got introduced and met new people that i now consider my friends, i moved to dc and i'm 10x happier and healthier (it's all the walking i have to do), i started taking classes and became excited about learning again and finally i now see my being unattached as a blessing instead of a curse, i value my independence for it made stronger and more resilient. for 2003 my hopes are: to travel more, start studying again, learn a craft or two, do volunteer work, buy a laptop and just embrace life with optimism and reckless abandon. have a safe and wonderful holiday. i just wish all of you the best and take care always. i'll be back next year!!! cheers!!